I’m at a bit of a loss as to what to blog about today. It’s strange because usually a few ideas for material spark in my mind while I’m doing the most ordinary and mundane of things. But today, nothing. You could say I’ve got a bit of writers block I suppose. My mind doesn’t seem to want to play ball today it would seem. and it feels like the all too familiar brain fog is descending on me once again.
Despite that though I’ve been feeling a little more positive of late. The credit for that I could put partly down to my most recent change of meds. Two weeks ago I started the process of coming off of the prolonged release Venlafaxine that a man who had never even met me decided I should be taking, (My local mental health partnership apparently only has one doctor allocated for the whole of Wiltshire) and started weaning myself onto Citalopram again. It’s an anti-depressant that I’m familiar with as I’ve been on it several times over the years, albeit in a much lower dosage than I’m building up to now. Anyway, that combined with a couple of Quetiapine hits a day seems to be doing the job of lifting my mood and more crucially stopping my urge to self harm.
I’m not out of the woods yet though and there’s still a long way to go. My mood has lifted enough for me to start thinking about the future a little and what the next few years could bring if I make the right decisions now.
For example I took myself out for a walk last week along the canal that’s near me and came up with a list of things that I do and don’t want from my next job. It was an idea that a friend had mentioned to me that she’d tried a couple of days previously and it really kind of resonated with me. I guess in the past I’ve always stuck with certain jobs because they were comfortable or they were a good, stable form of income. But I’d never actually had a job that I actually really enjoyed or that particularly interested me.
My most recent role was in sales. But there’s only so many times you can wheel out the same old patter to potential clients before you lose interest. Especially if you don’t really believe in the merits of the product that you’re trying to sell. So going back into a sales driven/target based role is out of the question.
I think I would quite like to take on a role that involves a fair amount of social media work. I enjoy using Twitter and harnessing the power that it can offer and despite not particularly liking it I am familiar with Facebook. You would think that in this day and age where a strong online presence is one of the keys to survival, most businesses would be crying out for people to come along and boost their reach and impact on the different social media platforms.
As you can probably tell I’m also a keen blogger. If there was a job out there that involved elements of both blogging and the aforementioned social media work it would suit me down to the ground.
The problem is I have literally no idea if such a role exists and whether I would even have any hope of securing it with my lack of qualifications.
Still, that’s not to say I’m giving up at the first hurdle. Not at all. In a few weeks time if my mood continues to lift and eventually stabilise I’ll take the list I made and arrange to see my job coach and see what ideas they have. And in the mean time I’m going to keep taking those small steps every day to help myself get better.
Any thoughts or ideas you have about possible roles that I could explore please leave a comment below. Ta.